Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Regarding My Absence

Guess who's back? Hopefully back for good, but I can't make any promises.

Follow the jump for a long story about why I've been gone.
[Outfit posts to resume tomorrow.]

I got behind on blogging when the end of the semester came around. I simply did not have the time or the energy to snap some pics and upload them to the blog. I hope you can understand. Thank you to those of you who reached out to me and noticed my absence. It meant more to me than I can explain. 

Once I was done with all my school related work, I just wanted to relax. But my visits to Bloglovin' were getting me down, and working against my attempt to relax. I was getting angry. There were so many bloggers posting about recent splurges, and how they have been going over their budget a lot lately. These women seemed to have no remorse for overindulging -- because that is exactly what they were doing. I'm not sure how "I saw blogger B wear item Y so I ran out and bought it -- it's okay though, because it was 10% off and I found an adorable X to wear with it!" is any different than "Instead of being content with one cookie for dinner, I ended up eating an entire cake... but it's okay because the icing was reduced fat!" 

At the end of the day, the blogger is still consuming more than they needed to (or I argue, should be) in the first place, and she is justifying it. She truly believes (or is trying to make her readers believe) that the behavior is natural, acceptable. 

Seeing this sort of thing regularly in the past month was really getting under my skin. I'm not by any means trying to say that I am perfect, but I have been much more aware of unnecessary and excess spending lately. Okay, so I bought a pair of heels marked down from $30 to $8 recently. That is an awesome deal. But I have yet to wear the heels, and so I really should return them. Regardless of the great deal, I spent $8 for something that I do not need.

After some emails from a few of you, I decided I needed to come up with a new strategy. How could I blog, but not get frustrated? The answer was so simple: filter. Stop visiting the sites that trigger the negative reactions. Guess what? It's such a simple solution, and it is incredibly effective. 

I appreciate your patience and support. I am too easily affected by negative energy, and hope that I can find a way to keep blogging fun - the way it is supposed to be!

10 comments:

  1. I really appreciate and admire your honesty. It can be frustrating when you see others wearing something new all the time or whatever. Glad to see you back :) Heather

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  2. Oh, Kate, I'm so glad you brought this up. You know I love you, and your honesty about this topic is MUCH appreciated and respected. You have an email coming your way soon...XOXO

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  3. I'm so glad you brought this up! I was saying the same thing to my husband the other night! I'm not a blogger just a blog lurker, and I've noticed lately many bloggers writing about their shopping sprees and their over-consumption. I find blogs which showcase bloggers who have a new clothing item for every post not as inspiring as those who re-mix items already in their closet. (I also wonder if the change in season has something to do with all the new clothes! I find I shop more when the weather changes.) Even those who thrift a lot of their closet, seem more interested in buying (getting a deal) than wearing. Glad you are back!

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  4. I felt really guilty reading this because it could be about me (oh god, please don't tell me I pissed you off though).

    but either way, I've really cut down on hate reading lately. I mean, what's the point of going to a blog where I know I'm just going to be annoyed. I unfollowed on bloglovin, instagram, and twitter. I check in every once in a while when I'm bored, but I feel a lot more content about it now. It's not like much changed - J still wears ridiculous clothing and PP is still covered in head to toe clothing that costs more than my rent, car payment, and grocery bill combined in just her purse.

    I'm glad you're back.

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  5. Looking forward to seeing you come back Kate! I here you on the overconsumption - I am totally guilty of it. Love your honesty and your blog! There are so many positive blogs out there and there's no reason to continue reading ones that encourage a behavior that's not acceptable to you.

    Alice
    www.happinessatmidlife.com

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  6. I really admire your ability to not overindulge, I'm not a blogger in any way but it's a struggle sometimes to remember the difference between want and need. Thanks for inspiring me to do better! I really take for granted the great items I already own.

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  7. Welcome back!

    I know what you mean about being frustrated with bloggers who justify over-consumption. It can be tough to see people wearing Madewell and JCrew when I feel weird buying a $6 Old Navy dress. BUT, I kind of just try to take it all with a grain of salt. I only follow blogs I like to begin with and there are definitely some that I follow that buy expensive clothes. I look at it as inspiration to wear something similar for a lot less. And if I get annoyed I just remind myself that we all have the right to make different choices. My choice is not to have any debt and I feel good about that choice. If someone feels good about going in to debt over clothing, well that's their choice.

    Anyway, I am a fan of your blog as you know, and I am looking forward to your return!

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  8. Great blog, so I'm a New follower on GFC =)

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  9. Love the honesty. I feel the same way. No idea how some bloggers can afford to wear brand name clothes everyday and never repeat any of it! I love to look at blogs that feature realistic clothes from places that don't charge a car payment for a pair of pants. I also find it way more creative to come up with outfits on my own rather than just order a head to toe look from somewhere.
    Keep up the greaet job.

    Pia
    pjmscloset.blogspot.ca

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  10. Yay you're back! and I hope you weren't talking about me because I did recently did make some splurges (though I offset the cost by selling stuff on ebay, lol). I know that you're super good with bargain shopping and I love that we think the same way about clothes (over-analyzing all our purchases, trying to get the best deal possible) and it bugs me to no end when bloggers write about how they picked up a shirt at Target for a steal or it was "practically free" when it was, in fact, full price at Target for $29.99, and I'm like, NO THAT IS NOT A STEAL. It's not a steal until it hits AT LEAST the 50% off rack and you have a coupon to use on top of that. And yeah, it's annoying when bloggers go over their budgets EVERY month, it's like, ok, if you have such a difficult time sticking to your budget, then maybe INCREASE your budget, or DO something about it, instead of continuing to shop and not making any changes in your spending!!!! But at the end of the day, how much others spend on frivolous clothes is none of my business :)

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